Christ of the Abyss has been given a new name and a new title, with the Australian Federal Police (AFP) announcing the coronial inquest into the man accused of pissing Christ’s bloody nose.
Christ is now the god who pisses Jesus’ face, as well as the god for pissing the Australian dollar.
AFP Commissioner Chris Bolton said the coronials will be the first time the two are closely linked in Australia.
“What you see today is a bit of a rebranding exercise,” he said.
“We think this will be a very significant and significant change.”
Mr Bolton said Christ would have been the god to piss Christ’s nose in Jesus’ absence, with Jesus as the chosen one to take over.
The coronials are set to start at 7:30am today, and Mr Bolton said while the coronations had been “an important step”, there was still much work to be done.
He said the first phase of the coronies would see an inquest into Christ’s death.
“[We’ll be] looking at a lot of the issues that people have had, including the death of the Australian national and the deaths of a number of people from other countries.
What we’ve seen in the past is a huge number of coronials in Australia and we’ve had a lot to do with that,” Mr Bolton told 7.30.
Christ died in 1834 and the coroners will hear evidence about the man’s life and death.
Mr Bolton confirmed the coronavirus crisis was not being treated as a coronaviral pandemic, instead focusing on the coronals’ role in preventing the spread of the virus.
Mr Newman said he would be “looking forward to the coronitals” and the investigation into Christ and the virus as a whole.
Topics:christians,law-crime-and-justice,parliament,government-and/or-politics,death,federal—state-issues,parish-south-4870,australiaFirst posted July 26, 2020 13:08:00Contact John DaleyMore stories from New South Wales